Well here we go again. Another reminder that artistic freedom has no value in this country. Read this Mumbai Mirror. Karan Johar apologizing to Raj Thackeray (yeah he’s the guy who says Maharashtra is for Marathis, all others please clear out, oh but he didn’t use the “please”) for using the Bombay instead of Mumbai in his latest movie Wake up Sid.

I wouldn’t have expected someone of the stature (yeah hes rich and famous) of Karan Johar to apologize for something like that. Last time I checked, it isn’t a crime to say Bombay (maybe in a warped MNS ruled Maharashtra, but thankfully we haven’t had to endure that yet). It doesn’t set the right example. What I would have done if I was Karan Johar was said “Fuck. Off.”

Maybe a little more politely (but only maybe).

Whats next? I get skewered for saying Bangy? or Madras? or Calcutta? (shudders)

Yes we read about this all the time. The zealots who burn down theatres. Raid art galleries. And generally take the moral high ground on matters that they dont have any authority over. And what we see even more often is the powers that be pandering to such sort of vandalism. That, in my opinion, is the sad part.

Mr. Karan Johar. Sad hai yaar. Kaafi sad.

You know when your heart does that weird thing where it jumps up into your neck and kind of sits there, refusing to go down again?
And suddenly your lungs seem to be in a tearing hurry to abandon your bodily cavities?
And the muscles in your face choose that exact moment to start rearanging themselves turning your smile into a half ass lopsided grin?

Well this happens every time I talk to you.
Damn.

How do you pass the time when youre on a long train journey with no company?

1. Sleep: First choice for me, but unsuitable for those who are averse to cramped spaces, incessant jerks, and a constant “chug chug” sound. But for those who can brave this, a nightout the day before and an upper berth makes for  a perfect combination.
2. Read: But again theres only so much of your reading that you can catch u on when the book and you are moving on two disjoint axes.
3. Music: An iPod can be a godsend, (I typed much of this on mine in hour 1 of my lonely trip back to KGP)
4. Ogle: Statutory warning: can cause risk to life and limb. Also severely restricted by the random selection of travelmates you have around you (I somehow always seem to end up with families, and no there are never any pretty girls around.  )
For those who want to give this a shot and want a strictly algorithmic approach, read Vinayak’s blog. He doesnt have a post dedicated to this, but the way he approaches the vagaries of life (taking a crap, chappals and the like) should give you some inspiration. To add my two cents read this/
5. Text random people: The girl you’re eyeing in college. The chaddi dost you havent talked to in a while, Random cousin. Hot female you met on internship. The guy on the next seat. Whoever. Its fun.
6. Write: Its what I did .
7. Sudoku! Carry the days newspaper along. Sure fire way to spend an hour.

any more ideas on how to spend time are welcome.

Friday, September 4, a very normal day in KGP. Until, that is, a Prof. tried to kill me.
Morbid, you say. You’re exaggerating, you say. He’s a professor, he can’t be murderous, you say.
Sadly, I’m not guilty on all three counts.

What do we know about the perpetrator?
Drive: Golden Maruti 800
Favorite Quote: I am right.
Hobby: Running people over.

Yes, so let’s dive straight back into it. Yeah, pretty normal day in KGP and all that. So I was on my way to a pre placement talk, on a cycle with no brakes (note), along with R (also note). Out of gate 5 of the institute, along comes SKRC (the Prof), in his golden Maruti, looking to turn right, into my path of travel. Seeing that as I didn’t have brakes, and my current rate of speed would take me crashing into said golden Maruti, I did the sensible thing. I sped up a little and crossed the car from the front. A few points to note:
1. At the time of crossing, there was at least a distance of two meters between the front of the car and the cycle, so the probability of collision was very low (unless the driver was a psychopath, which, on hindsight, he was.)
2. The only disturbance to traffic caused was an extra blast on the horn.

I moved on, and a few meters past gate 5, R sped past me, saying something to the effect of “The Prof. is following you in his car, you are fucked”. Well, ok, I kind of expected that. So yeah, I would have to stop, say sorry, he would berate me, and then he would mumble and go off to his sad life again. So, I prepared to slow down.
What happened next was beyond my wildest imagination.

10 meters behind me, he started honking madly, signaling me to stop. I slowed down, and put my feet down in an attempt to slow down. (Ref. Exhibit 1: Cycle with no brakes (PS: Thanks Chin2 for that )).
Next thing I knew, the car was beside me, and dangerously close to hitting me. Still believing in the inherent goodness of all professors, I waved my hands and shouted, “Sir, no brakes. I’m stopping”.

Apparently, he hadn’t heard me, or didn’t want to. Or didn’t care. Anyway, in true road rash (or NFS, depending on what age group you are) style, he ran his car into me.

Yes, you heard me. He did it. He knocked me over with a car. (I mean, what kind of puny, idiotic, dumb, !@#!@#, person, does that. Definite head case if you ask me).

Well, so I fell over. To the side of the road. With my cycle. Duh. As I was trying to get my bearings, and figure out which one of my bones I’d broken this time (yes, this time), the most amazing thing happened. Really.

SKRC got out of his car, took a step towards me, and said…..

Wait for it…..

“What do you think you are doing?”
……………#!@#!@#……..

Yes, that’s what I thought too. So much for “Sorry I just tried to run you over”.
Here I was, knocked over by his car, which he was driving, deliberately, (and rashly) to push me off the road, and yet he comes up with a gem of an opening statement.
Ya, well after that, I pretty much realized that this was no normal person, he was clearly off his rocker. And the conversation (mild word for “heated exchange”) which followed was something like this.
“What do you think you are doing?”
“Sir, the cycle had no brakes, I was trying to stop….” (I dropped the Sir after that)
“Why you come with cycle like that?”
“eh?….”
“You could have gotten me into trouble with your stunt..”
“eh?… You just ran me over, I’m sure you should be in more trouble than I am”.
“Who do you think you are?”
“eh?..You just tried to kill me, you hit me with your car, deliberately, I might add”
“I don’t know. I am right.”
“So just to get this straight, every time you think you are right, you try and run someone over?”
“Who do you think you are?”
“I think it’s time for your pills”
“I am right.” (This was getting to be a recurring theme.)
“You can try and hit the fat guy who’s coming down the road. It’ll be fun. He’ll even roll better.”
“I am right.”
“Yes, of course you are. Now run along home.”
(Ok a little exaggerated, the last bit, fact is I had the upper hand ) Yes, and I have at least a hundred witnesses who were walking by.

Word of advice to fellow Kgpians:
Watch out. It could be you next time.
Really.

I might be going overboard with all the pre season hype and be forced to eat my words later, but eh what the heck.

So after all the hype about how Ronaldo (I still havent gotten around to calling him slave) made the club richer, and how SAF seems to be stuffing all the money down a deep dark hole somewhere (insert cartoon of old man with sack here), I still think we have a pretty good shot at the title this year. Why, you ask?

1. Owen seems to be looking good, and (I pray to thee O Lord) able to play more than one game in a month. And of course, there is no doubt about the fact that he is a good striker, when hes not on the bench nursing one of his innumerable injuries.
2. Ronaldo replacement Antonio Valencia has given a good account of himself, and looks set to be able to meet right flank requirements.
3. Berba seems to be running a lot more than last year.
4. Giggs (incredibly) seems to have another year of soccer up his sleeve (or wherever hes getting all that energy from)
5. Rooney is still God.
6. Gibson and Carrick seem to be forming a good partnership in midfield.
7. Anderson has scored. Yay!
8. Nani is still pissed at being left on the bench.
9. The kids ie Tosic, Macheda, the Rafael twins, Evans, Cleverly (whos that you ask?) seem to be well fed and in their nappies. Ok I was a little strong on that, they seem to be decent players, and ready to put in real strong contributions.
10. Liverpool will still shoot themselves in the foot, and Rafa will pull the trigger.
11. Arsenal is phhhbbbtt.
12. Chelsea is, well, Chelsea.
13. And We Are United, and we value the badge more than the player. Which Real Madrid doesnt seem to understand anyway.

This Sundays Charity shield with Chelsea should be a cracker.

Edit:
14. Manchester Citeh must die. I mean seriously, they will be in the top 4 this season (tries hard to keep a straight face, and fails) HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

I can still recall
the twinkle in your eyes
the twitch of your nose
the curl of your lips.
Singular.

I can still recall
the sunshine in your hair
the sound of your laugh
the touch of your hand.
Divinity.

I can still recall
the smiles we shared
the walks we took
the moments of bliss.
Happiness.

I can still recall
Your every move
Your every word
Your every breath.
Love.

I’ve just about finished watching this movie, and I’ve been left feeling thoroughly confused. What was the director thinking when he based the movie in the period of the holocaust? The only character that seems to be connected with it is Kate Winslet’s. But the script never really explores her character that much. All we see are scattered glimpses of her in the trial and that in itself fails to bring out the emotion she was going through. And there was the part with the young Michael during the trial and the identity crisis he goes through. But that’s all stuff we have seen before. The novelty quotient wasnt there.
Or maybe I have missed the point altogether. Maybe it wasnt meant to focus on the holocaust and that the time period was just incidental. But then, was the point of the movie to explore the relationship between Michael and Hanna? Well it certainly leaves a lot to th audience to figure out. Maybe a little bit too subtle? It seems the director was trying too many different things and failed to pull all of them together.
Credit must still be given to Ralph Fiennes and Kate Winslet for their performances. Fiennes was sensational. Kate really came to life in the second part of the movie, but I have my doubts on whether she should have won an Oscar. I’ll have to watch the other movies that were nominated for best actress before I can comment on that.

Edit: Meryl Streep in Doubt is wayyyyyyyy better.

Credit goes to this video, part of a viral marketing campaign, to create a buzz about a new software which would be in the same genre as matlab but much simpler to use.

Heres some of the other stuff we created for the branding campaign
http://www.slideshare.net/ritwik/ad-camapaign-for-jensal

I think I am a war freak. The thing is I have always been fascinated by war; the history behind it, how it panned out, the heroes, the villains, the tragedies, the victory, the aftermath, top to bottom, everything that happened.
No surprises then that the second world war is a particularly favorite period of history for me. And since I have started writing fiction, ideas for stories just keep popping into my head, and most of them are centered around the theme of war. Pity I cant find time to put those plots to words. I really want to see how it comes out.

Also, for more ideas on how to spend idle vacations doing something worthwhile check out this. Aamer was a classmate of mine at school in Delhi, and now hes in Toronto on an exchange program. And making quite a difference to a lot of lives. Here’s to you Aamer!

Yes, this IS inspired by the two books by Indian authors that have captivated audiences worldwide, and won one author the man booker, and the other considerable royalties. Coincidentally, these are the two most recent books I have read.

The overwhelming feeling both of these books left me with was one of inadequacy. Both the authors do an admittedly wonderful job of tearing the veneer of India Shining to pieces, and go boldly into the underbelly of The Other India. Adiga and Swarup take us on a journey through what lies beneath. They tell us that in India, the persons with money still have the power, that democracy is still a faraway dream for some of our fellow countrymen, that corruption is still something that the average Indian has to contend with.

Many questions are raised, chief among them being whether I know the real India. I can safely say that I don’t.

Am I going to do something about it?

I don’t know.

60 years after independence, we have at least achieved some of what we aspired to. But there is still a long way to go.

I dream of an India in the new millenium…

I dream….